Monday, July 26, 2004

Is being retarded a good table image?

So I blow out of work on Friday afternoon and head to Casino AZ.  The 4-8 tables have a wait but 3-6 is open right away so I sit down.  Nobody looks scary at the table so I pretty much assume everyone is going to play like an idiot.

After a few hands of folding, I notice the player in the 1 seat seems to be taking a long time to make his decisions and is acting like he hasn't played before.  He's asking how much to bet, he stares at the board a long time seeing if he can make something out of his hand, etc.  Some of the players were starting to grumble that he was slowing up the game.  I took some initiative and told him that it would be more considerate to the dealer if he sped up his play because he depends on tips and the more hands he deals in an hour, the more money he makes (plus hopefully the more money I make, but I was trying to be nice).

He smiled and nodded like he understood, but kept on taking a long time.  Finally I get involved in a hand with him.  I have top pair with a good kicker and value bet it on the river.  He calls me and turns over middle pair along with another pair that he caught on the river.  Good if he's willing to draw to a 5 outer heads up then I am going to make some money.

About 45 minutes later, the seat changes next to me on my left and this player mentions that he has seen the "retard" playing before and that he thinks it's an act.  That he is actually a good player and knows what he is doing.  I don't know if I quite believe it, but it keeps me entertained for the next 1/2 hour looking for cracks in the facade.

Then the coup de grace.  Retard is in big blind, I am one off the button.  I am dealt J-10 offsuit with a Jack of diamonds.  A couple of limpers and I call and the guy on my left (button) calls as well.  Retard in BB raises and everyone calls.  Flop comes 7-8-9 with 2 diamonds.  I have the temporary nuts.  In this small cloud of euphoria I decide I am going to wait until the turn to raise to get the most money I can in the pot.  Retard leads out, two players fold, I call, and the button raises.  Hmmmm.  Now I think I'll check raise the turn.  The turn brings another diamond so now there are 3 on the board.  Rechecking my position I realize that trying for a check raise would be stupid since there is only one player on my left and he may check it through.  I am also watching the retard stare at the board and my read is that he may have one diamond but he doesn't have the flush or the straight. 

Retard bets and I raise.  The button folds and mutters to himself about his cursed luck.  Now I am waiting for this guy to cower in my presence but he raises back?!  He hasn't been this aggressive in any hand.  I call and pray for no more diamonds.  5th Street is........Ace of Diamonds.  Due to my optimistic nature I think to myself, well now I have the Jack high flush and there are only 3 hands that beat that.  The Ace, King, or Queen.  Now the Ace is out so there are only two that beat me.  Retard now asks the dealer,"What happens if we both have flushes, how is the winner determined?  Since it's an Ace high flush do we both split it?"

Alright, maybe has the flush but I am going to call no matter what because the pot's too big to walk away from.  He bets and I call.  He turns over two Kings.  For an instant I think I am good until I realize one of his Kings is a diamond.  Ugh!

Amazingly I kept my cool and said "good hand".  I have been chased down enough that I pretty much accept it as part of the game.  I also found it amusing that after the hand, the player on the button told me he also had J-10 for the nut straight but was scard to death of the third diamond on 4th street.  At least one person at the table respected my raise.

The retard used that hand as a spring board and won a few more and probably doubled up his chips before I had to leave.  His image was really irritating the other players and I think it was causing them to play stupid.  If it was an act, it was a pretty good one.  I give him credit.

As always any comments from lurkers are appreciated.

1 comment:

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